[verse 1]
You sort your glass on a Tuesday night
Feel heroic by the glow of that kitchen light
Tiny sticker on your bumper says “Save the Earth”
But your grocery cart’s got beef jerky—what’s that worth?
[pre‑chorus]
Yeah, you rinse and you repeat the same advice
Turn the tap a little tighter, baby—nice
But every steak on your plate is a pipeline in disguise
So tell me who’s really making sacrifice?
[chorus]
It’s Environmentalism for Dummies, honey—
Counting coffee grounds while the planet drains
Low‑flow toilet saves three gallons—funny
When your burger flushed six‑six‑oh down the drain
Turn off the shower, feel so clean
But the dairy in your latte is a drought machine
Go vegan if you wanna be seen
As the eco‑dream you claim on that recycled tee
[verse 2]
Paper straws in your mason jar—adorable
Posting zero‑waste hacks, feeling charitable
But methane rising with every cheesy bite
Is louder than your compost in the moonlight
[bridge]
We’re planting trees, we’re hugging them, too
(But they won’t outrun the barbecue)
Skip the plastic—that’s step one
Step two is ditching bacon, son
‘Cause the rainforest falls for your pepperoni
No amount of up‑cycling will make it holy
[breakdown]
Climate math ain’t sentimental
It’s arithmetic, not accidental
Your kale salad dressed in ranch?
That’s carbon cost you can’t outrun, can’t blanch
[chorus]
It’s Environmentalism for Dummies, honey—
Counting coffee grounds while the planet drains
Low‑flow toilet saves three gallons—funny
When your burger flushed six‑six‑oh down the drain
Turn off the shower, feel so clean
But the dairy in your latte is a drought machine
Go vegan if you wanna be seen
As the eco‑dream you claim on that recycled tee
[outro]
So trade the steak for chickpea stew
Watch your footprint shrink right under you
Recycle love, reduce the lies
And veganize to real‑time climatize ✨
